What you want, I ain’t got; and
goddamn,
I have the sinking feeling that it’s happening
again,
as night is falling down upon me. I submerge,
accordingly—
await my death.
My death eradicates mistakes I’ve made,
and saves.
My death is a great red pen, correcting—
according to
Vodka,
on top of Fibromyalgia,
on top of Anxiety,
on top of Depression,
on top of Rx medication.
*
Two years dead,
and I’m still fucking seeking
mother’s affection.
I beat my breast,
claw my throat,
shake my insignificant
fists.
I cry confessionals ‘til Hell won’t have ‘em.
*
I have the sinking feeling that it’s happening
again,
as night is falling down upon me. I submerge,
accordingly—
await another death.
Each one eradicates mistakes I’ve made,
and saves.
I am pain,
and all my deaths
are a great red pen, correcting—
according to the spiders spinning webs
within the folds of gray matter.
©2019 Kindra M. Austin
Kindra M. Austin lives in an unobtrusive village in Mid-Michigan. She is the author of two novels (Magpie in August, and For You Rowena) and two books of poetry and prose (Constant Muses, and TWELVE). Her third novel is expected to be released in early 2020, and her third book of poetry, All the Beginnings of Everything, will be published by Indie Blu(e) in July, 2019. Austin and Christine E. Ray founded Indie Blu(e) Publishing in September, 2018.
Other publications include contributions to We Will Not Be Silenced: The Lived Experience of Sexual Harassment and Sexual Assault Told Powerfully Through Poetry, Prose, Essay, and Art, Anthology Volume I: Writings from the Sudden Denouement Literary Collective, Swear to Me, and All the Lonely People.
Reblogged this on Morbid Corvid and commented:
New poetry written by me, on HL&M.
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Reblogged this on cabbagesandkings524 and commented:
At Heretics, Lovers, And Madmen, Kindra M. Austin dies over and over again.
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Thank you so much!
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Happy to do it
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❤
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Wow! Amazing, as always!
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Thank you so much, John! ❤
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Love this so much! Amazing writing ❤
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I love you! Thank you.
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You’re welcome! Love you too ❤
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Thank you! ❤
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You’re welcome ❤
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Reblogged this on A Wise Woman Writes.
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Excellent rhythm and use of repetition and the imagery, hot damn this is goodness.
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Oh my gosh. Thank you!
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This is one of my favorites from you Kindra. amazing writing. Death indeed is a red pen correcting out mistakes that we are late to correct.
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Megha, you are so fantastic, and I appreciate you. Thank you very much!
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I love you so much Kindra my dear friend.
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❤ ❤
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Reblogged this on Megha's World and commented:
Read this brilliant poem from one of the talented authors I’m proud to call my friend – Kindra Austin.
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This is truly a killer piece. Excellent!
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Wow! Thank you so much. Sending you good vibes! ❤
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Many thanks, Kindra. I can certainly use them!
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❤
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Reblogged this on The Abject Muse and commented:
I just had to share this phenomenal piece by Kindra M. Austin.
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❤
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I reblogged this on The Abject Muse.
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Reblogged this on Brave & Reckless and commented:
Brilliant writing from Kindra M. Austin
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Thank you, Love! ❤
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Gave me the chills. 🙏
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❤
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🖤💘
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❤ ❤
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The rhythm and the way it flows are excellent. The repetitions are so well placed. You did it again, my dear — but then you always do.
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Thank you Goddess B! ❤
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You are welcome! Many kisses!
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❤
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I had to read this again. So good.
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Thank you! ❤
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I love love love it. Not that all that shit happens, but your gorgeous expression. Hope things are okay? ❤
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