She Wore Emptiness-Kindra M. Austin

She wore emptiness,
and I condemned her mantle, as I had
Jehovah-god
and all the men possessed by
devil’s hands.

And
I convicted
her—

Murder
of the
Self.

She wore emptiness,
and never learned one goddamned lesson. Sometimes
fists make
poorly teachers;
maybe mine’ve made a difference. Maybe
I
should’ve beaten her, too.

Purple was her favorite color:
symptom of her
madness.

She wore emptiness,
and I wish I’d stripped her
bare
of
all—
before the world,
in face of Hell and eyes of
Heaven.

I wish I’d screamed her truths.
Those gagging truths inside my mouth,
behind my teeth and
tiger crouching,
taunting my unwilling
throat.

I wish I’d taken emptiness
and made it into
hope.

I need some fucking hope,
but
I
wear
emptiness
in
her
stead. And
what honor is there in taking up her mantle?
 
Mama,
I’m sorry.
I couldn’t do no better.

© 2019 Kindra M. Austin


Kindra M. Austin lives in an unobtrusive village in Mid-Michigan. She is the author of two novels (Magpie in August, and For You Rowena) and two books of poetry and prose (Constant Muses, and TWELVE). Her third novel is expected to be released in early 2020, and her third book of poetry, All the Beginnings of Everything, will be published by Indie Blu(e) in July, 2019. Austin and Christine E. Ray founded Indie Blu(e) Publishing in September, 2018.

Other publications include contributions to We Will Not Be Silenced: The Lived Experience of Sexual Harassment and Sexual Assault Told Powerfully Through Poetry, Prose, Essay, and Art, Anthology Volume I: Writings from the Sudden Denouement Literary Collective, Swear to Me, and All the Lonely People.

Read more of her work at Kindra M. Austin and Morbid Corvid.

 

17 Comments Add yours

  1. Kindra M. Austin says:

    Reblogged this on Kindra M. Austin and commented:

    My debut on HL&M.

    Like

  2. bobcabkings says:

    Good to see you on H,L&M, Kindra.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Kindra M. Austin says:

      💜

      Liked by 1 person

  3. bobcabkings says:

    Reblogged this on cabbagesandkings524 and commented:
    Kindra M. Austin brings a daughter’s meditation to H,L,&M

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Kindra M. Austin says:

      Thank you so much! ❤️

      Liked by 1 person

      1. bobcabkings says:

        You’re welcome.

        Liked by 1 person

    1. Kindra M. Austin says:

      Thank you Henna! ❤️

      Like

  4. Reblogged this on Brave & Reckless and commented:

    The brilliant Kindra M. Austin on Heretics, Lovers, and Madmen

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Kindra M. Austin says:

      Thank you!

      Like

  5. I am struck by its power more each time I read it

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Kindra M. Austin says:

      ❤️

      Like

  6. Jamie Lynn Martin says:

    I don’t even think I have the words, other than omg! This is an amazing piece, beautiful words my friend.♥️

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Kindra M. Austin says:

      Thank you so much! Eeep! 💜💜💜

      Like

  7. Raw and truth told in an unflinching manner. Always a treat to read your poetry,Kindra

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Kindra M. Austin says:

      You are so kind and encouraging. Thank you, Megha. 🧡

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Always a pleasure Kindra.You will always be my role model.

        Liked by 1 person

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